You know what’s wrong with today’s society? No one understands personal space anymore. I cannot leave the house without either being bumped, crowded in line or within kissing distance of a total stranger at some point during the day.
I understand that I am a small person but come on people there is no need to run me over. Just today I was leaving the sporting goods store and a woman tried to “brush” past me and nearly spun me around. I’m sorry were you really in such a hurry to buy camping supplies that you needed to mow me over? And of course, I was raised correctly so I am the one that apologized which made me even madder. I wish they made a force field you could turn on when you left the house and when anyone came within 2 feet of you they suffered a tiny shock. (I don’t want to kill anyone just startle them a little bit)
Then there are the neck breathers. Oh dear baby Jesus in heaven help me not punch the neck breathers. I am standing in the exact same line you are in. I have to wait the same amount of time that you do and breathing your hot, stinky breath down on me is not going to make the line move any faster. If I can feel your body heat on my back, YOU ARE TOO CLOSE. I am just going carry one of those fart machines around in my pocket and when someone starts crowding behind me I will just let one rip. Too bad those machines don’t make the smell as well.
As I mentioned earlier, I was raised correctly so I am a helpful person. If you look lost, confused or need help with something I automatically hop to it but please, please stop trying to explain your problem to me lip to lip. I am short but my ears work just fine I promise. Our breath does not have to co-mingle for you to get your point across. If you are under the age of 5 or above the age of 70 I’m going to go ahead and give you a pass but anyone else I am just going to start licking. It’s not like I haven’t just been breathing your germs for the last five minutes anyway, I don’t see how a little lick is going to make it worse.
Let’s all make a pact right now that the next time we leave the house we will pay attention to our surroundings and keep at least 12 inches between ourselves and the other people at all times. My last nerve thanks you.